Dialogues(2)

Here are a few more converstations:


Me talking with the wanna-be world dominator:
Me:Hiya!
Yuanmashita Suzuki:Hiya????!!!Just how illeterate can you get?When I conquer the world I am going to ban all forms of improper language.
Me:O..K
Yuamashita Suzuki: Are you listening to me?Why would anyone speak initials that stand for Oll Korrect(which in itself is a misspelling) if he's not a MORON??
Me:Ermmm... besides the fact that Ok is the most commonly spoken word on the planet, what do you mean by 'when I conquer the world'??Do you know that world domination is next to impossible?
Yuanmashita Suzuki:Never mind that.I'm gonna get a bunch of nukes, bomb Amelica and a couple of other countries, take over the rwmains and lead an army across the rest of the civilized globe(The uncivilized ones would come later).
Me:How do you get acess to the nukes?
Yuanmashita Suzuki:I'm gonna steal the rugby ball.
Me:It's called the football.
Yuanmashita Suzuki:Nevar mind that.
Me:At any rate,how do you steal the Football.It is a completely secure object with over 10 NSA agents and several CIA agents watching over it.Oh and it is Bulletproof and permanently attached to an aide.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuclear_Football#Contents.
Yuanmashita Suzuki:Never mind that.
Me:So what exactly would you do to help mankind if you in the impossible event that you actually conquer the world.
Yuanmashita Suzuki:I'm going to make it mandatory for all but the old and the infirm to jog for an hour while holding their mouth wide open.
Me(trying to humour him):Because you approve of exercise and fresh air??
Yuanmashita Suzuki:No,because I hate flies.

Student vs. un-resonable parent(s):
Youfye:Ermmm;here's my report book.
Quote from report:
Math teacher:I've seen worse
English teacher:Not as atrocious as some
Science teacher:She does not think that she's proud, but then again she doesn't think much else either.
Form teacher:I wish she'll find some form!!!!!


After ten minutes;
Youfye's Father:If you don't have better grades by next year,somebody would be whipped.
Youfye's mother:I don't think corporal punishment is the only solution.
Youfye's father(pushing his wheelchair foward):
Nonsense!I got whipped a lot when I was young,and look at the man I am now!
Youfye's mother:But dear ,you can't walk.
Youfye's father:A small price to pay for perfect manners!